How to Soothe Worry and Anxiety

Do you think worry is contagious? I think worry is contagious.  This week, my little two year old started flowing clear snot out of his nose. It was just like a flooded street where the rain runs down into the drain.  And I knew right then in that moment: everybody’s going to start getting the sniffles. It’s just so contagious.

Just like the sniffles tend to be, worry is contagious. When I step into a room and four other people are worried about something, I not only feel their worry and feelings of anxiety, but I wonder, should I participate in the worry? The first question we usually ask is, Are you okay? Is everything okay? Or, what’s going on?  Maybe our minds even go to the worst-case scenarios. Immediately, we worry, and then we reach out to someone, and our worry has an impact on them.

In social situations, whether it’s in person or online, I have observed that what usually happens is someone will share a meme, a story or an important piece of news. Packaged with that item they’re sharing is often the question: should we collectively start worrying about this?

the contagion of worry

This is a reality of our daily life. We face the choice to succumb to the contagion of worry. The good news today is worry is optional. Jesus Christ himself said, what does worry add to your life? Which was kind of a roundabout way of saying, there’s no need to worry here. Once you are in with the Lord and once you are his child, you have nothing to worry about. 

If we’re not required to worry, but worry is contagious, then what do we do when we catch it? And how quickly do we know we’ve caught it? And what do we do about the physical symptoms that sometimes come up because of chronic worrying?

Recently, I took a break from Instagram. When I do this, I usually get a handful of messages from you guys saying, Hey, are you okay? Where are you? Is everything?  There are times when I have a lot on my plate and I have to be on quiet on social media–and it’s so good for me. This doesn’t mean that something bad has happened. It may just mean that I need to take breaks from some things to work on other things and this is a normal part of life. When people ask me if I’m ok and suggest that something might be wrong, it’s a clue that there are feelings of worry and symptoms of anxiety of simmering just below the surface.

In times of war and societal upheaval, when stress and anxious thoughts from everyday situations threaten to consume us, we have to anchor ourselves in John 16:33 “I have told you these things. so that in me you may have peace. In this world, you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”

The impact that you are leaving today in your family is going to have generational impact. Will it be a story of catching worry from other people? Or will it be a story of people who are prepared to say that even when times get hard, joy is always available? Will it be that despite any potential threat, we can have the joy of the Lord at anytime?

What does this practically look like to have joy? 

Last week, I totally caught worry. It was low grade at first, it was just a sniffle, it was just like, “Oh, should this be something I should be concerned about?” I noticed physical changes and negative thoughts. It compounded and it got worse throughout the week. And the Lord reminded me again why he gave this message in the first place. The message is peace is not something we ever have to lay down, but it’s something that is always available to us because of our right standing with the Lord. He loves me and he loves you.

Not only does he love you, he cares about you and your daily activities. He reminded me that even when worry is really tempting, you can hand it off to him. He says, cast your cares onto me for I care about you. My question to you today, dear friend, is have you caught worry? Are you sick with worry and you didn’t know it?  Did you hang around a friend or a family member who is concerned about something and you asked yourself, should I be concerned about this too?

One of the reasons that I started the Peace on Purpose podcast and the reason you’re listening to it today is that I provoke peace in believers. Our goal as Christians is to demonstrate that we take a different path than the world–a path that is not riddled with excessive worry or anxiety attacks. 

And when people ask where is your joy coming from? Where is your steadfastness coming from? Where is this love coming from? You can say it is through grace and empowerment of the Holy Spirit. It is not accomplished through our own effort, but in submitting to the leading of the Holy Spirit and remembering our position before God. A Christian who is disarmed by worry is not an impactful Christian for the kingdom. And don’t we all want to be as impactful as we can be?

I believe with my whole heart that here on this earth, we are to practice heaven. And when unbelievers see us practicing heaven they will want to know why we’re doing what we’re doing. They’ll ask, either aloud or to themselves, how is this possible? It’s an aroma– a fragrance to those who are wanting Christ and they see it being lived out in you and in me and they want it for themselves.

I’m not saying you’re not suffering acutely. I’m not saying there aren’t a myriad of things to worry about in our daily lives, but what I’m saying is there is a peace that passes all understanding that is available at all times–whether we’re experiencing traumatic events, stressful situations or different types of family problems. While we live in this world, those things are a reality. 

Maybe you are the one in your family choosing to breaks the chains of a generational curse in your family of chronic worriers. Perhaps you’re the one to cultivate peace on purpose first.  As you go first, other people will start to ask questions and they will want to follow. You might also have to journey alone as you strive for peace on purpose.

A peaceful heart leads to a healthy body.  Let me say that again. A peaceful heart leads to a healthy body. I don’t know about you, but there are times, and even right now, that I sense the Holy Spirit saying, how are you feeling? Are you just a little sore getting out of bed? Do you feel really tired or have a physical reaction to facing each new day? Do you feel run down, overcome, burdened, heavy, like you just need to take a nap? Are times of stress leading to impacts on your physical health? The impacts can compound over a long time and increase your risk factors for a long-term condition or disease. God made the spiritual and physical to work together and, of course, they impact one another.

Jesus is known as the Prince of Peace and yet here we are acting like we’re forgotten or that God doesn’t see or that it’s too much to ask him to bear for us. Friend, God wants to carry you this season. Give your cares over to the Lord. Talk to Him. 

I also want to give you a couple really practical tips and tricks that help me to release some of the worry that arises during stressful events and ongoing anxiety.

Tip #1: Watch your kids. They’re outside playing on the swings, laughing, excited about sprinkles, asking for dessert, laughing, playing, getting in trouble, but they are full of joy.  They make believe, they pretend, they run around, they are not worried about what’s happening in the world. Watch them. Thank God for these moments and ask him to show you how you could be more childlike in this moment.  Thank him for the good things that are happening. There is nothing in this earth that’s going to be perfectly good ever, but we have a perfectly good Savior who says enter my joy, I am doing good things.

Tip #2: (Maybe this is a different approach than what you’ve heard about before.) Decide to quit complaining. Complaining is the opposite of hope. It’s hopelessness.  When we’re complaining a ton, we perpetuate hopelessness and then we worry. Complaints and words of gratitude can’t live together. Gratitude increases your peace, so choose that over complaining.

We can catch peace, instead of catching worry. The antidote for worry is peace. There’s a part of your brain that you can access only through prayer. God’s word says to take your thoughts captive. And how we do that?  We pray for the Lord to intervene, to remind of his words, to help us re-frame our worry and focus on his goodness. Your brain is literally designed to bring healing. When Paul says to pray without ceasing, he’s not talking about just “dear God…and Amen”, He’s talking about a continual conversation and communion with the Lord. He wants you to remember that worry is optional. And yes, worry may be contagious, but we know about the medicine. You are going to be offered a million and one things to be worried about this week, but you have a choice how to respond. 

I’m so glad you are here and I hope you’ll pass this blog along to a friend who might be blessed by it.

Your trusted friend,

Mama LB